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The Light at the End of the Tunnel - Karen's Musings
Random Rambling
estherchaya
estherchaya
The Light at the End of the Tunnel
Lightattheendtunnel2_2

Sam has now slept through the night seven days in a row.  Abby, while still waking up in the middle of the night, usually does have a six-to-eight hour stretch somewhere in the night (problem is, she goes to bed at 6:30, so that doesn't help US much!).  Yes, I get that, medically speaking, six hours is sleeping through the night, but practically speaking if she goes to bed at 6:30, wakes up at 12:30am and then proceeds to wake up every three hours, that may be sleeping through the night, but it really doesn't help us much, does it?  What is more common is that she wakes up around 11pm and 4am, which I can live with. 

I prefer it, though, when she sleeps through her 11pm feed which she used to do regularly, and I'm not sure why she reverted.

That being said, I will not ignore my baby's hungry cries.  Particularly Abby's.  She has been on a ridiculous hunger strike ever since we introduced solids.  The only thing she'll eat is yogurt, but she turns her nose up at all other food, and doesn't even enjoy bottles of mommy's milk anymore.  She fights mealtime like it's pure torture, and I don't get it.  Poor kiddo.  When I took her to the doctor to get checked, she was, fortunately, still on a perfect growth curve, despite only taking in about 400 calories per day (compared to her brother and sister who take in closer to 800-900 per day!).

Before you all get on me about various methods of sleep training, the pediatrician agreed with me that she's not taking in enough during the day to ignore her at night.  She simply needs more calories and if she's waking up at night to eat, we must feed her.  Furthermore, she's not a baby who can be force-fed during the day to make up for what she's not taking in.  She screams bloody murder if you try to force food into her (whether it's bottles or solids).    No sense in forcing my baby to cry. 

Still, we can see that light shining brighter at the end of the tunnel.  But careful what you wish for, because my bed is empty and I feel the emptiness so clearly now.  Just as my arms used to be heavy with the emptiness of infertility and the babies I wished would fill them... now my arms are empty in the middle of night as I reach for my Sammy, who used to snuggle with me all night as he went on his all-night-all-you-can-eat mama-buffet binges.  Are those a thing of the past?  Will I never again get to snuggle with my snuggle monster?  Is my bonding time done?  *Gasp*  Where has the time gone?  Did I forget to savor every single moment?  What will I do without him??

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ichur72 From: ichur72 Date: June 11th, 2008 08:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm with you on the not-ignoring-cries-of-hunger bit. I did sleep training, but I also know that if my daughter eats, it's because she's hungry. She won't nurse if she's not hungry. So if she wakes up at night, I know it's because she needs milk or a new diaper.

And I'm with you on missing the nighttime snuggles too! I may not enjoy stumbling down the hall to feed or change a crying baby, but I certainly don't mind looking down at her little face in the dark.
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: June 12th, 2008 01:43 am (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, my babies don't wake up for anything other than food. And they go RIGHT back to sleep when they're sated. So I don't believe for a second that there's any reason not to oblige. They go to sleep well for naps. They go to sleep (for the most part) well at bed time. They are good sleepers. If they wake up, I'm going to feed them, PERIOD.

I'm sure that I haven't seen the last of Mr. Sam-Man in my bed at night, but still, I clearly have seen the last of the nightly-routine. And golly, how did I miss that LAST night? How did I not manage to realize that would be my last opportunity for snuggles?
ichur72 From: ichur72 Date: June 12th, 2008 03:08 am (UTC) (Link)
Confound those children for not letting their mothers read their minds!
marag From: marag Date: June 11th, 2008 09:07 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm certainly not going to lecture you on sleep training. You do what feels right for you and the babies and everyone will somehow muddle on :)

I really wanted to say how *fascinated* I am by all the women I know who get sad when (for example) their kids move to their own bed, or some such thing. My reaction at all of these milestones has not been "my baby's growing up!" but "whee!"

(Note: I'm not saying there's anything wrong with your reaction. If anything, since I'm apparently the only woman who doesn't react this way, I'd say there's something wrong with *me*.)

Excuse me, Yael wants to type something to you:

ojtgrffdxzut09876199987555kngaqwlojbfgdeeettgho;po8iuqruhnn

I asked her what it says: "When baby sister and I went for a walk, then it's her had a boat, but it doesn't tell me what happened next."
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: June 12th, 2008 01:41 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, I'm all FOR him sleeping through the night. And I'm all FOR not getting kicked in the face all night. And in THEORY, I'm all FOR never having to wake up with a baby to nurse him/her. It's just when I wake up and realize there's no snoozing snuggly baby and probably won't be for a long time or even ever again... that's when I realize that a chapter has closed, and it's...

It's not that I'm sad to move on to the new stage. It's that I'm sad that I missed out on that LAST time. How did I not realize that LAST time would BE the last time??

*sniff*
From: have_inner_lady Date: June 12th, 2008 12:33 am (UTC) (Link)
I don't think the snuggle monster moments are done. Probably they just change.

Having a 7-year-old boy come to you because he wants to (in spite of a roomful of games and toys, with no request for food or other help, just to hug because he wants to hug you at that moment) is wonderful in its own heartening, humbling way.

It's not over by a long stretch.

p.s. I think your tunnel is hilarious.
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: June 12th, 2008 01:39 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, I know it's not over. But it will be different. This PARTICULAR type of snuggling is coming to a close. And that's okay, but it's a little sad for me, even though I'm also rejoicing at the possibility of some slightly-less-interrupted sleep.
hannahsarah From: hannahsarah Date: June 12th, 2008 02:44 am (UTC) (Link)
I totally understand. I had a good cry when I had to put away all of Rivka's newborn clothes and get her the next size up.

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