Karen (estherchaya) wrote,

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The five questions meme returns

It's back. Which is great 'cause I love this one. You know the drill. If you want me to ask you five questions, tell me so and I'll do so. Then you post the questions and answers in your journal with similar instructions, and so on.

These are from pocketnaomi:

1) Why did you want a foster child?

We didn't, exactly. I mean, well, we did, but... Okay it's a long story...
Most of my life I've thought that I'd like to have foster children. I think that the foster system in general is a very good idea and works well on paper. It only works, though, if there are enough "good" families volunteering to be foster parents for the *right* reasons. Honestly, Seth and I had never really discussed this sort of buried desire of mine.

Now for the TMI. I love children. I do. I'm not always the best with them, but I love them and I try. Having not been able to get pregnant, I find myself as a sort of "surrogate-mom" to a number of small children. That's great, and I love that role, but it's also an awkward role. Back in the fall, when I was unwilling to even consider something as drastic as IVF I began thinking that I had a lot to offer a child and that I would like to at least be able to help someone else's children reach their potential. It was a niggling little thought and I didn't even discuss it with Seth. This, in and of itself, is an oddity because we discuss almost everything with one another.

Anyway, I didn't do anything about these thoughts. Then one day I was sitting at work and I suddenly got it in my head to look at Montgomery County's information/requirements to be a foster parent. "Well, this is nice," I thought. "I'll just file this info away for later and talk to Seth about it in the next few months." That was it. Several hours later I checked the voicemail at home. At approximately the same time I was seized with the urge to visit Mont. Co.'s website, my rebbetzin had left a telephone message saying she didn't know if we'd be interested, but she knew of a "situation" that we might be interested in "participating in." The "situation" involved a one-year-old boy who needed a foster home for at least a year, maybe more and that was all she knew. I called her back and left a message saying, "we're interested to hear more, but I need to speak with Seth and get some more information." I called Seth, who ironically was driving up to Dundalk to pick up a kitten we had agreed to foster until we could find him a home (okay, we ended up getting the kitten back, but that's an even longer story). I got him on the phone and said, "Okay, I know it seems like I'm adopting everything in sight, but hear me out!" "Sure," he said. I explained everything I knew (which was next to nothing), and he responded, "Okay, but if we get a 1 year old, we're not keeping the kitten." That was fine by me, since I had no intention of keeping that furry little ball of allergens for any longer than necessary.

The rest, as they say, is history. Julian was privately placed with us, so he's not a "foster" child in the legal sense of the word, but we are his legal temporary guardians (by court order). He'll be with us until he isn't. That could be in the fall; that could be when he goes off to college. We just don't know.

2) What do you find the most annoying Torah law to keep?

That's easy. Shatnez. I find no spiritual, religious, emotional, moral, or ethical connection to keeping this mitzvah. For the most part, I haven't paid close attention to it, not because I don't believe it's important, but because I lack the motivation to make it a priority.

3) What do you like best about your job?

Hrm. That's a toughy. I like having a job. Seriously. I enjoy having a career in which I have nearly limitless potential if I want it. As it happens, I don't want it, at least not yet, but I like that my potential for career growth here is large. I love my boss. He's been a real mentor to me, even before he was officially my "boss" and I can see that now that I'm *officially* in his group, he's making sure to encourage me to learn some new things about the business which are essential to my (future) promotion within the company. I love my client, in that this isn't a high-stress environment 95% of the time, which is rare in the consulting business. Mostly, I'm proud of myself for making it in a field so far removed from my original dreams.

4) You've just been handed 48 hours off. No job responsibilities, no kid responsibilities, no home responsibilites -- you're not allowed to do any of those even if you wanted to. Only the religious obligations of an ordinary weekday. You can get anyone else you want free under the same terms for the same time period. What do you do with it?

The absolutely pathetic thing is that I have absolutely NO idea what I'd do with 48 hours off. I'd probably sleep. Or read. Or both. And maybe take a day trip to NY or something. Maybe I'd go up to Boston. Probably not. I'd probably just relax and/or sleep. That's really sad.

5) What is your philosophy on the naming of cats?

I haven't one. My husband is the cat person. I mean, the kitten was my fault, but it was completely unintentional. I never intended to keep him. I just couldn't let a 4 week old kitten remain homeless. So he came to us, we found him a home, it didn't work out, he came back, he got so cute we couldn't return him. The poor kitten went through a whole lot of names: "No Name," "That Bastard," "Zathrus," "Hey You," "Fuzzy Monster," "Ow, ow, let go you stupid little rat," among others, which eventually settled on Nibbler. I don't care for naming cats anything that I could conceivably name a child. So that doesn't mean all people names are out, but it takes out a lot of names. Like, odds are, I wouldn't name a kid "Mortimer" so if I wanted a cat named "Mortimer" (Morty for short), I could do that. But Seth had a cat that came with the name "Charlie" which I think is ridiculous.

The fact is that Nibbler didn't have a name for so long because I couldn't figure out WHAT my philosophy on naming cats was. Nothing fit. They all felt forced. As it turns out, I don't like the name Nibbler anymore, which is as I feared. So maybe I'm just crazy.
Tags: interview, julian

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