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wow. Long week - Karen's Musings
Random Rambling
wow. Long week
So um, I was going to write about my week, but frankly, I remember very little about it. Because the trump card came out Wednesday night when I talked to my mother. My grandmother, who is on oxygen 24/7, lit a cigarette without turning her oxygen off. Right. Brilliant. If she didn't have dimentia, I'd be making crass comments about her IQ. Suffice it to say, she's got 3rd degree burns on her forhead and lesser burns into her scalp. She has COPD and Parkinson's, so they don't feel like they can do a surgical skin graft, because they're afraid they wouldn't be able to get her off the ventilator afterward. So they're going to treat her medically first and see how that goes. She's not in any pain, because the nerve endings are all gone, and she's the center of attention right now, which is exactly what she loves, so she's doing pretty well so far.

I seem to be the only person who takes this as one huge freaking clue-stick that she shouldn't be living at home. She lights herself on fire and still people think she's better off at home. What if my grandfather had been asleep? What if she'd been inside and not outside on the patio? Yeah, but she's still better off at home. Bullshit. Apparently Texas law is pretty much on the side of keeping her at home too. I just don't get it. I'm seriously not interested in waiting around until next time to find out what happens then. Yeah, if I'd been married to Seth 60 years, I probably wouldn't be keen to send him out of my house. But he hasn't lit himself on fire!

Argh. Enough of that.

Julian went to the doctor yesterday. He's 26 lbs 11 oz, which is 79th percentile, and 33.5 inches, which is 99th percentile for his age. Oh, and he might be getting a cavity, so he's never allowed to have another bottle ever. Um, right. This doctor doesn't know his history. No way am I taking that bottle completely away before I talk to the child psychologist. So last night at bedtime he got a bottle of water. Just one. And no milk. And that's fine. Except I think that the nanny isn't going to be thrilled about this. Tough. So we'll work with just a water bottle and only at night for a while and see where that goes. Then next Wednesday we have an appointment with the child psychologist and we'll talk about the best way to wrestle the bottle away from him completely. But I just think it's ridiculous that the doctor literally told Seth to go home and throw away all of the bottles and never use them again. She knows nothing about this poor kid's history and if she does, she sure as hell didn't take it into account.

Anyway, he got several shots, which seriously pissed him off, but he's okay now. Yay for baby.

And that's about it. Frankly, I can barely remember anything else that happened this week. Oh, except I got about 100 letters out for the shul journal solicitations. Only 250 to go...

Current Mood: blank I'm here

9 comments or Leave a comment
From: gingy Date: December 17th, 2004 06:59 am (UTC) (Link)
Dear Missus:

I have to come to SS to pick up a ham (of all things). When are you home?
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: December 18th, 2004 05:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
today! Oh, wait, we've already seen each other. Jimmy gets cuter every time I see him!
cellio From: cellio Date: December 17th, 2004 07:22 am (UTC) (Link)
If your family insists on keeping your grandmother at home, can they at least be talked into having some sort of in-home caregiver? I don't know how these things work, but I do know that your grandfather can't be there and attentive 24x7! He's got to sleep sometime.

Ok, what's the connection between cavities and bottles?
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: December 17th, 2004 07:46 am (UTC) (Link)
on several occasions, my mother has set up caregivers to come in EVERY day for several hours to help my grandfather out. This usually lasts a couple weeks before my grandfather changes it to once or twice a week. 24/7 care, which frankly is what they ought to have there, is $92K and up per year. They couldn't just get a non-nursing in-home aid (you know, advertising in the paper for a live in helper) and supplement with nursing caregivers a few times a week because no one would stick around for long once they discovered how nasty my grandmother can be (and is!). I'm dead serious about that. My grandfather won't even consider selling the house and moving to assisted living. And he flat out refuses to consider putting her in a nursing home. Doesn't leave a lot of options.

As for the bottles... it's not the bottle that's the problem, it's the milk, which is why I'm trying a water bottle in the interim. The milk has sugar in it and it pools in their mouth overnight and the sugar eats away at their teeth. We do brush his teeth, but I suppose there's only so much that's going to help. Doctors tend to frown on bottles and pacifiers by this age in general anyway. I think the idea is that if they are drinking from a bottle, they won't drink from a cup. But this kid will definitely drink from a cup. So I dunno. Anyway, he'll get one bottle at bedtime with water in it, and we'll figure out a way to take it away completely after we've talked to the child psychologist next week.
From: gittygiggles Date: December 17th, 2004 07:42 am (UTC) (Link)
lauren told me about your grandma. you know...you can laugh about it in a few years....

when are you and julian coming to play?
either_or From: either_or Date: December 17th, 2004 10:03 am (UTC) (Link)
i wouldn't worry too much about the cavity. it's just a baby tooth!
(Deleted comment)
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: December 18th, 2004 05:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
indigodove From: indigodove Date: December 17th, 2004 01:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
Umm, you might want to make sure your doctor knows baby's history, so s/he can give advice that is good for all of him. If you don't think s/he knows, write out a concise one-page letter explaining and mail or fax it to the office.

This message brought to you by your friendly neighborhood ex-social worker :-)
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: December 18th, 2004 05:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
I know that it's in his record somewhere, because the last time I took him to the doctor (a different doctor), he asked me how the fostering was going. This doctor didn't give any indication that she knew this part of his history. He's never seen this doctor before. My feeling really is that I'll work on weaning him off the bottle, but I'm not going to take it completely away cold turkey without talking to the psychologist because right now it's his one "security" thing. He hasn't taken to a particular blanket or toy as his security, but the bottle is his comfort. So, no more milk in the bottle at bedtime, and no bottles during the day if I can help it. But he's getting a water bottle at bedtime at least until Wednesday when we meet with the psychologist.

Thanks for your advice. I do appreciate it. And I'll probably write something up to stick in his chart for the future. I'll bring it next time we take him to the doc.
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