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finally a post about our visits with Julian - Karen's Musings
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estherchaya
estherchaya
finally a post about our visits with Julian
I've just been posting quickies about Julian, but here's an actual entry about our visits.

So we had Julian over for the first time without his grandparents on Monday, the 18th. He didn't have any little baby meltdowns, which was surprising (apparently the one time his grandmother left him at day care, he had an hour-long, unconsolable meltdown). He ate grapes and cheerios and some weird baby food from a jar. He loved playing with oranges, and took a couple bites out of one (left huge teeth marks in it!), but when we peeled one and let him try a little piece, he hated it and was pissed off that we'd destroyed his round ball. ;) He sought out Charlie, even if Charlie was in the next room, so he's clearly aware of their presence and he enjoys them. A favorite game was throwing the orange at Charlie. Fortunately, his aim is bad. I think the most frustrating thing for him is that Charlie, unlike Seth, wouldn't roll it back to him. :) He doesn't like having his diaper changed, but what kid does? I think it gets in the way of his busy schedule. He's got too many important things to do to be bothered with diaper changes. His grandmother, Gershona, is trying to establish memories for him, so I always talk to Julian about what we did, and then give Gershona a summary, so that she can talk to him about it during the day ("remember going to Eema and Abba's house when you played with the orange and chased the kitties and pulled on Abba's beard?").

The only little baby disaster we had was an inability to install the carseat in my car. So I left Julian with Seth (and they didn't burn the house down!) and drove over to a friend's house and she put the carseat in. So we were able to get Julian home to his grandparents without too much trouble. Unfortunately, when I took it to another friend's house the next day, she told me it wasn't installed correctly and she didn't think it was very safe. She she lent me one of her carseats and installed it. Now that I've seen how hers installs, I realize that the original carseat really WASN'T in safely. It moved too much. Apparently 4 out of 5 carseats are installed incorrectly. So Seth went and bought me another one which we'll put in my car, and we'll take the other carseat to the county and have them figure out how to properly install the seat in HIS car. (The county provides a service that does free safety checks on carseats, which is excellent) Hopefully, they'll be able to figure it out. Four grown adults could not figure this stupid thing out. And it's not like I've never installed a carseat before. At any rate, I'm just happy to have the new one, and we'll figure out the rest eventually.

The only problem with having him Monday was that I felt like death. But Seth was there and did much of the chasing. I played with Julian on the floor and read him stories, but when Julian wanted to be chased, Seth did the chasing. We didn't have him Tuesday, but we did have him Wednesday. Wednesday was problemmatic because I still felt like death, but Seth was out. So I had the little guy mostly by myself. We went and played with Lis for a little while. Well, I played with Lis (translation: she and I chatted) and Julian played with her three kids. He played very well with them and seemed a little overwhelmed with all the activity at first, but he caught on fast. Once we got home, Julian and I sat down so he could eat. He does NOT like macaroni and cheese one bit. He still likes grapes and cheerios. Gershona is very insistent that he continue eating three jars of baby food a day instead of loading up on table food, because she "likes the nutrition" in the baby food. Well, there's no kosher baby food that's got meat or dairy in it (at least not that I know of, and frankly, I probably wouldn't want to pay for it if there was). So he's not getting a lot of protein. And he likes table food just fine, so I don't see what the big deal about baby food is. Suffice it to say, this is something we'll likely move away from once he comes to us full time. Anyway, obviously, he's not going to starve.

Anyway, it was a little harder to have him Wednesday because I felt crappy. Jo and Cary came over for a bit to grab a bite to eat before an appointment they had in Silver Spring. It was good to see them, I just wish I'd been in a better mood. Julian was being very cute for them, so that they wouldn't be afraid to come back when he's with us full-time. :) I need to give him a little something extra in his paycheck. ;)

Last night was a night off from Julian (one of the few we have left!). Seth got a lot done. He got a lot of the books out of the guest room, so that we can turn it into a room for Julian. He did a lot of cleaning. And he bought a new carseat. And he *still* managed to bring dinner home. With Julian away for the night, despite feeling awful, I was able to get a lot of dishes done, and the kitchen cleaned up quite a bit, as well as clearing off the table and straightening up the few stray toys that remained from Wednesday's visit. I didn't accomplish a lot, but I was pleased that I did anything, since my instinct was to sleep from the minute I arrived home. I do feel better, but I'm sore everywhere from all the coughing (oy, does my back hurt!), my throat still hurts, and it's still painful to draw a medium-sized breath. Shallow breaths aren't too bad, but they are, of course, inefficient. Still, it's a vast improvement that I've been at work two days in a row, so I'm not going to complain just yet. I'm almost done with my antibiotic and by some kind of miracle I've actually managed to take EVERY dose! I have two more left, so I might have just cursed myself, but I'm still pretty impressed with me.

We'll have Julian again Sunday, this time all day. We'll pick him up at 11, he can have lunch and a nap at our house, and some play time, and then we'll take him time in home for dinner/bedtime routine. The evenings at our house have been a little rough on Gershona, because it's thrown his bedtime off. So that's why we'll get him home early Sunday. Monday I am volunteering at the mikveh, so we won't have him again until Tuesday, when we'll have him over night. Squee!! I'm sure that won't be a piece of cake, but it's great because it means things are moving right along.

Wednesday morning Gershona said she'd pick Julian up, but I realized it made more sense for us to just take him home on our way to the attorney. We're meeting with an attorney who specializes in child advocacy at 9:30 am not far from Gershona's house. I'm looking forward to the meeting with the attorney, but not looking forward to the bill. Sheesh. I should have stayed in law school for what she bills! Ah well. She comes highly recommended and we really do need a good attorney. Plus, if we were to pursue adoption or foster parenting outside of this particular situation, we'd need an attorney to help us navigate the waters a bit, so it's a good thing to meet with her regardless. She asked me some very good questions on the phone when I called to confirm the appointment, which relieved me a little. And she just got out of a trial a couple days early, so she's got time to take on some new cases, which is perfect timing.

At any rate, that's enough blithering. We're nervous and excited all at once, but mostly just happy. Er, and sick. But I'll get over the sick part.

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Comments
From: gittygiggles Date: October 22nd, 2004 08:55 am (UTC) (Link)
The county provides a service that does free safety checks on carseats, which is excellent

where do they do that? i can't find ANYONE who will do it here.

:D
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:17 am (UTC) (Link)
I'll let you know when I find out. I know it's by appointment, so I have to look into getting an appointment. Don't know if there's a similar program for Baltimore.
From: gittygiggles Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:53 am (UTC) (Link)
oh there is. i spent 2 hours trying to find the stupid place. ergo, i'm going to go somewhere that's EASY to get to.
jeannegrrl From: jeannegrrl Date: October 22nd, 2004 10:56 am (UTC) (Link)
("remember going to Eema and Abba's house when you played with the orange and chased the kitties and pulled on Abba's beard?").


I had to tell you I got the biggest, stupid ol' grin on my face when I read the Eema and Abba comment. I am SO darn happy for you two and thrilled to pieces that this is progressing so nicely. Remember, save some playdates for us! :-)
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:12 am (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! We're excited. Just a couple legal hurdles and we'll be on our way! And I'm sure there will be plenty of playdates!
From: gittygiggles Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:55 am (UTC) (Link)
you have a 1 year old too??? i'm looking for normal people with kids! if karen knows you, you've got to be normal! so where do you live? :)
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: October 22nd, 2004 12:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
Jeanne has a 6ish month old (I think Mali was born in March...I could be wrong) and a 2 1/2 year old. She lives in Silver Spring, but not the same part of Silver Spring as me. Um, and why are you looking for normal people? You are anything but normal!
From: gittygiggles Date: October 22nd, 2004 12:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
alas. i dont have the words to explain to you waht the baltimore population is like. you should ask lauren why i'm looking for normal people. she'll explain quite well. and i'd like to think i'm more normal than the pod ppl that live here.
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: October 22nd, 2004 12:35 pm (UTC) (Link)
I was teasing about the normal bit.
From: gittygiggles Date: October 22nd, 2004 12:42 pm (UTC) (Link)
i know, but i dont think you truly appreciate the wasteland i live in ;)
estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: October 22nd, 2004 12:50 pm (UTC) (Link)
I am not unfamiliar with the Baltimore Jewish community, trust me.
jeannegrrl From: jeannegrrl Date: October 22nd, 2004 02:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
hehe - I don't know about "normal" ... I have a 2 1/4 year old and a 7 month old. We live about a mile from the intersection of New Hampshire and Randolph
From: gittygiggles Date: October 23rd, 2004 05:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
well...normal as in....not baltimore :p

i have no idea where that is. i presume it's silver spring?
jeannegrrl From: jeannegrrl Date: October 23rd, 2004 05:40 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yes, but barely Silver Spring - practically Colesville/Burtonsville. It's about a 15 minute drive to Karen depending on lights and traffic.
From: gittygiggles Date: October 23rd, 2004 05:46 pm (UTC) (Link)
i dont know where those places are :/

i'm in nw baltimore city.
jeannegrrl From: jeannegrrl Date: October 23rd, 2004 06:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
Ah - well my inlaws live in Pikesville (Greengate) - we get up there about 3x a month or so...
From: gittygiggles Date: October 23rd, 2004 06:21 pm (UTC) (Link)
ah! lovely! we live near the agudah on park heights! feel free to let me know you're coming and we'll go play!
lionsaoi From: lionsaoi Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:15 am (UTC) (Link)
I'm thrilled for you! :0) You and Seth seem to be wonderful parents.

estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:29 am (UTC) (Link)
squee!
lionsaoi From: lionsaoi Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:57 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, I keep meaning to post about this.

But, I've started the Community Wide Conversion Class this fall. We meet every Monday to (hee) study Torah, Jewish Life and Hebrew. It's a nifty class, because we get to visit all the local synagogues and study with a number of the local rabbis. (Interestingly enough, my favorite thus far has been a rabbi associated with a conservative shul that teaches from an orthodox siddur and doesn't let women read Torah publically; I'd like him as my rabbinic sponsor, but I don't know if I want to go to his synagogue.)

The class is really cool, and I like the fact all the different movements are taught together. :0) Hebrew is going well and, since languages are my thing, it's really easy to pick up. I know shin, tav, beth, lamed, mem, mem sofit, hey (sp?) and reish, plus about 3 vowels. I can even write "shabat shalom" now!

I'm really happy, although I do feel somewhat lonely, since I don't really know anyone. And, living at home has been difficult, as my mom is rabidly anti-religious; that tends to limit my observance at home, sadly. But, once I move out on my own (in January), I plan on increasing my observance and even taking baby steps to keep kosher. (See, I finally figured out that my reluctance to keep kosher is one of the greatest things telling me I should follow kashrut.)

Sometimes, I even forget that I'm not Jewish.
ichur72 From: ichur72 Date: October 22nd, 2004 11:48 am (UTC) (Link)
This is so neat ... I am thrilled for you and Seth.
fheyd From: fheyd Date: October 25th, 2004 08:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
Ok, i'm sure it's because i've missed something while i was out, but Eema and Abba?

estherchaya From: estherchaya Date: October 26th, 2004 03:33 am (UTC) (Link)
Hebrew for "Mother" and "Father"

We didn't want him calling us mommy and daddy because he has a mommy and daddy, and we didn't want to confuse the issue. On the other hand, we didn't want him calling us Karen and Seth because if we are able to adopt him, it'd be a weird habit to break him of.
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